Hello! I’m going to warn you right now that this is a very long post. So grab yourself a tea and a comfy chair and let’s begin!
Disclaimer: I want to first say that every body is beautiful. If you’re a size 6 or a size 16, you are beautiful. As long as you’re happy, healthy, and confident in your skin, then that’s what matters. ALSO this was a very hard post to write, so please be kind.
Alright. Now that’s out of the way, I want to tell you a bit about how I’ve somehow became a plus sized lady and lost enough hair to make a wig. A couple months ago, I had noticed that I hadn’t been feeling myself. I noticed that I had gained a lot of weight (I’m talking a LOT of weight), my hair was falling out by the chunks, my brain was ultra foggy (we’re talking mid-sentence-word-forgetting-scrambled-brain fog) and that my depression and anxiety was becoming almost unmanageable once again.
If you know me, you know that I’m not a willing participant when it comes to getting blood work done. It’s the unknown that get’s my knickers in a twist and I’d much rather avoid it like the plague. But I knew it had to be done… and I’m glad I did.
In November, my doctor told me that I was breaching over the line of having hypothyroidism. Basically, my thyroid was NOT having it with the rest of my body. Hypothyroidism is a condition in which the body lacks a sufficient amount of the thyroid hormone. That had explained why I was not feeling myself because I wasn’t. My body wasn’t producing things that I needed to feel healthy, energized, and well.. good.
Since then, I have been on medication and am due for more blood work to see where my thyroid is at.
But what does this have to do with becoming plus sized? Well, lots. You see, I have always struggled with confidence issues. When I was a kid and into my teenage years, I failed to see myself as a beautiful girl that was created by an even more beautiful God. I saw myself as fat, ugly, and oh yeah… fat. As I grew up, I accepted myself for how I looked and felt good in my skin. But since all of this has happened, I have found that my confidence had plummeted. I’ve been more concerned with the number on my jeans. I’ve felt way more depressed. I look at photos of myself and I would pick apart every inch of me (literally… like when did I get a double chin?!).
BUT HERE’S THE THING! It’s all unhealthy lies.
YES. I have gained weight but that doesn’t take away from my beauty -inside and out. I know that I can make changes outwardly by exercising and eating healthy. But it’s important to remember your mental health too.
If you’re like me and you have found yourself picking a part how you look, here are two things I want you to remember:
1. You are capable of being healthy.
You don’t feel healthy? Make a change. Create a food plan. Cut out sugars or other things that are not good for you. Join a fitness class. Go to the gym. See your doctor. Everyone has the capability of feeling better physically. But if you find yourself wanting to lose weight for unhealthy reasons, then stop, take a step back and reevaluate why you want to do this. (TRUST ME. I’m saying this to myself too.)
2. Your mental health is important, too.
Don’t forget – your physical health is important, but so is your mental. Before you do anything, make sure you feel healthy mentally. Depression is a very, very real thing. So is anxiety. Talk to someone you trust if you need to. See a professional if it’s really bad. Need to go on medication for a while? That’s okay. It’s all going to be OKAY. I know how hard it is to feel unhealthy mentally. Trust me. But you are capable of change – remember that. You are worthy of being healthy mentally too. Seek the help that you need. You got this!
At the end of it all, I want you to know that it’s important to take care of your body. It’s the only one you get. Change is hard but you are strong and can do anything you put your mind and heart to.
J. xx